“Selling My House With My Ex Due to Divorce… What Can I Do Now?”
This is a real situation we hear more often than people realize:
“We’re selling our house due to divorce. We didn’t live in the home long enough to build equity. Our income dropped, and now we’re paying rent and the mortgage. The house sat on the market for six months with no offers. We tried a short sale, got a buyer, but the lender refused to come down $10,000. The buyer walked. We can’t keep paying both. What options do we have?”
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone—and no, you are not out of options yet. But timing and strategy matter more now than ever.
In my 15+ years helping Rochester homeowners navigate divorce, foreclosure, and failed short sales, I’ve learned this: The worst move is waiting without a plan.
Let’s break down what’s really happening—and what you can do next.
What’s Actually Going On Here (And Why This Happens)
This situation usually involves three compounding problems:
- No equity (or negative equity)
- Life change (divorce + income reduction)
- Time pressure from the lender
When a home sits on the market for months with no bites, that’s the market telling you something. A short sale is often the right next step—but lenders are not required to approve them.
When a bank refuses to reduce the balance (even by $10,000), they are effectively saying:
“We believe foreclosure may net us more—or we’re willing to take the risk.”
That puts the homeowner in a dangerous holding pattern.
Option 1: Appeal or Escalate the Short Sale (If Time Allows)
Before walking away completely, ask:
- Was the short sale fully documented and properly priced?
- Was a Broker Price Opinion (BPO) or appraisal challenged?
- Did the negotiator escalate the file to a loss mitigation supervisor?
Pros
- Keeps foreclosure off your record
- Least disruptive outcome
Cons
- Takes time you may not have
- No guarantee the bank budges
- Meanwhile, payments continue (or default worsens)
This option only works if foreclosure is not imminent.
Option 2: List Again — But Only If Something Changes
Re-listing without a major shift is usually a mistake.
This only makes sense if:
- The price changes dramatically
- Market conditions improve
- You can financially survive another 60–90 days
Otherwise, you risk burning more time while foreclosure advances in the background.
Option 3: Deed-in-Lieu of Foreclosure
In some cases, a lender may accept the property back voluntarily.
Pros
- Cleaner than foreclosure
- Stops the bleeding
Cons
- Still damages credit
- Not always approved
- No relocation help
- Zero control over timing
This is often treated as a last internal bank solution, not a homeowner-friendly one.
Option 4: Sell Before Foreclosure to a Qualified Local Buyer
This is the option many homeowners don’t realize still exists, even after a failed short sale.
A local, experienced buyer may be able to:
- Re-open negotiations with the lender
- Structure a direct payoff or alternative resolution
- Close fast enough to stop foreclosure
- Absorb legal, title, or timing complexity
Important Warning
Not every “cash buyer” can do this. Many will tie up the property and fail, making things worse.
This only works if the buyer:
- Is local
- Has real funds
- Uses NY attorneys
- Has experience with short sales and foreclosure timelines
What Happens If You Do Nothing
This is the hard truth most people don’t hear clearly enough:
- Foreclosure does not pause because you’re overwhelmed
- Divorce does not stop the clock
- Banks do not negotiate under pressure—they escalate
Waiting without action removes options. Acting early creates leverage.
How We’ve Helped Rochester Homeowners in This Exact Situation
At Brett Buys Roc Houses LLC, we’ve stepped in after failed short sales, including cases involving:
- Divorce
- Zero equity
- Declining income
- Foreclosure notices already issued
We don’t promise miracles. We promise clarity.
That means:
- Reviewing the lender’s position honestly
- Explaining whether a sale is still viable
- Coordinating with local attorneys
- Moving fast only if it actually helps you
Sometimes the answer is selling to us. Sometimes it’s not—and we’ll tell you that too.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can I still sell after a short sale is denied?
Yes—if foreclosure has not finalized. Timing is critical.
Does divorce change foreclosure rules?
No, but it often accelerates financial strain and lender action.
Will foreclosure happen immediately?
Not usually—but once legal proceedings start, options narrow quickly.
Can a buyer really stop foreclosure?
In some cases, yes—if they are experienced, funded, and local.
Final Thoughts: You Still Have Time—But Not Unlimited Time
A denied short sale feels like a dead end. It isn’t.
But your next move matters more than anything you’ve done so far.
If you’re unsure what to do next, the smartest step is not guessing—it’s getting real answers.
Visit brettbuysrochouses.com no pressure, no scripts. Just a real conversation about what’s still possible.
Sometimes the best outcome isn’t obvious—but it is achievable with the right help.